


Quiet Home

by millions_harmony



Series: I will always hold your hand, Dean [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alpha Benny Lafitte, Alpha Castiel (Supernatural), Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Grief/Mourning, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Miscarriage, Mpreg, Omega Dean Winchester, Past Relationship(s), Pregnant Dean Winchester, Protective Sam Winchester, References to Depression
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-28
Updated: 2020-09-22
Packaged: 2021-03-04 01:40:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,416
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24961690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/millions_harmony/pseuds/millions_harmony
Summary: Dean Winchester was happy as his life was the very definition of perfect as it can be. Given the chances to fall asleep then waking up next to his alpha mate and husband everyday, he couldn't ask for more. Years dated and then finally tying the knot, Dean was excited to let himself basked in his omega needs; which is to bear his very own children. Thus, when he was expecting their first child after years worth trying, an unexpected news hit him like a bullet train. What could be worst?
Relationships: Benny Lafitte/Dean Winchester, Castiel/Dean Winchester
Series: I will always hold your hand, Dean [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1806628
Comments: 2
Kudos: 60





	1. One.

**Author's Note:**

> Just a slight reminder, this first chapter would be on relationship between Benny and Dean. This idea had been running inside my mind so I wrote it down, hoping you guys would like it more or less. My second attempt on Destiel related stuffs so bear with me. Read the tags first before you guys go on with the reading. 
> 
> With that being said, enjoy! 
> 
> This work is not beta read so, sorry for any mistakes.

Benny was amazing. Simply because of the gentle southern Cajun drawl that always drew Dean closer and also how perfect of an Alpha the older man was. They met in highschool, Benny was two years senior than Dean at the time and both of them were the star althlete in the baseball team.

Being an Omega, Dean was always been so discreet and careful enough to hide his scent with some strong beta blockers he never forget to put on every morning before school. Benny was an Alpha, it was very obvious by the muscular build and broad chest that always made Dean drooled over whenever he caught the sight of his crush.

Dean was fifteen when he admittedly realized that he's having a crush on an Alpha. A male one at that. Growing up, he used to believe that he'll someday found a pretty girl to date, and mate before they'll grow their own family years later.

Ha, never did he thought he'll end up with Benny.

And now here they were; married and happy. They have been together for a whole seven years now since the first time Benny asked him out on a date once upon a time when they were at college. _Yes_ , fate was really siding up with them when he discovered he'd gotten into the same university as Benny. He remembered knowing it from Sammy just a day after he'd finished with his heat. He couldn't help a fresh gush of slick at the news making his younger brother grimaced with _ew Dean, you just finished your heat yesterday and go shower now you fricking stink!_ before the sixteen year old rushed out of Dean's room with a hard slam of the door.

Couldn't help it really, just the thought of being so close with Benny made him imagining _other_ things he'd done with the alpha.

A smile broke out his face as he reminisced back the time he made Benny came just by presenting himself with two fingers deep in his slickened hole. Nevertheless, Benny apologized, blushing furiously and eventually he made it up to Dean only half an hour later as he gave Dean the best climax in the world.

“You're smiling. What's on your mind cher?” Benny's gruff voice anchored him back to the current world; where both of them were cuddling up on the couch, watching some reruns of a horror show.

Dean shifted his head into the base of Benny's neck so he could scent his husband's alluring and soothing smell of fresh homebake pies and apple with a hint of leather. _Home and mate_. _His safety._

“Nah, just remembering something.”

Benny kissed the top of Dean's head before asking again, “Care to share with the class?”

Dean huffed out a small chuckle.

“No, I don't think you'd want that.”

Benny was quiet for a moment and so Dean waits for the revelation. Seriously, he could literally heard the gears in his alpha's head were turning.

“Please tell me it's not _that_ time when I was clearly embarrassing myself the first time we've had sex…?”

Benny talked a little fast as he drawled out the words making Dean laughed in response. _Gosh, this never gets old._

“You know it is.” Dean smiled into Benny's neck as he heard the rumbled of the alpha's groan.

Silence falls between them again, only the voices of the actors on the TV filled in the space. Benny looked down at his omega, before his nose caught up with a barely there smell of sweet honey and ripe apples in the air. Years living with Dean, he knew how familiar the scent was even if it was still very faint.

“Dean?”

Dean scuffled in reply, burying his nose even closer into Benny's neck, taking in the smell of his alpha from the scent glands beneath the skin.

“Dean?” Benny tried again, and this time Dean ‘hmm’ in answer.

“When's your heat due?” the alpha asked.

“Two weeks. Why?”

“I think I could smell you already. Just barely but it's there. This never happens before but maybe you'll due sooner?”

As on instinct, Dean reluctantly moved away from his husband's neck before he scented the air. He couldn't get the specific scent yet but...the longer he focused, the more his nostrils caught the faint smell of his heat pheromones. Benny was right. Maybe he'll due sooner, in a week or so..perhaps days?

“I guess so, yeah.”

He settled back in his position before but he soon changed his mind. Benny's shift wasn't until 2PM and Dean's on his off day tomorrow. With that thought in mind, he began straddling his alpha, Benny's eyebrows furrowed at the sudden posture before those handsome devilish smirk was plastered on his face.

“I think we need to be ready, yeah?” Dean moved closer, both their groins touching.

“You know I'm always up for that, mon cher.”

Soon they were kissing, clothes were thrown haphazardly onto the floor and the TV soon fades into their background as they made love on the couch for the night. When Benny's knot had calmed down, he slipped out and carried Dean towards their bedroom for another round of love making; sweet words of love whispered into each other's ears before they were soon retired to sleep; bodies flushed together, hearts beat in sync.

That night Dean dreamed of a small boy, dark haired with the prettiest blue eyes he's ever seen was looking up at him. Curious, Dean kneeled so that he'd leveled with the kid.

“What's your name?”

Instead of answering, the kid tilted his head; blue eyes never waver from Dean. “…m—mama?”

_Aww, he's looking for his mom_. Dean thought as he smiled at the kid.

“Tell me your name, then we'll go find your mama? Okay?”

The small boy still staring deeply into his eyes, not even responding to Dean's question before the kid suddenly jumped forward and before Dean react to it, the dark haired boy mashed his face into the crook of Dean's neck.

“Mama! Mama!” The boy began again, small arms wrapped tightly around Dean's neck.

Dean was speechless, as he felt his heart seized almost painfully in his chest. Then he remembered—all these years Benny and him had tried to have kids on their own, with him being an omega which was clearly possible. But, after so many heats he shared with Benny, he never got pregnant. He's been off his birth control pills for three years now and they have been going to doctor's appointments but still, to no avail.

No morning sickness, no weird cravings, and never positive results.

Dean fell into depression just a year ago, but Benny—the perfect alpha he was—always been there for him. He was patient with Dean's crazy random moodswings, and he was still solidly just there whenever the nights Dean wanted to be held and loved again. Then when Dean went missing for a week, Benny kept calm and searched for him to bring him home again even when Dean's scent was mostly sour and pungent in distress. It was Benny who managed to bring him back to the end of the tunnel, where the light shone the brightest. Benny was there, with him and waiting for him to regain his strength. To be Dean again.

A single tear slid down his cheek as he finally realized he was crying. The small hands of the boy now cradling his face, cute little thumb caught the tears just in time.

“Mama don't c..cry.” The boy speaks in that small adorable voice, blue eyes were glossy with building tears as if he'll cry too if Dean cries.

Dean choked out a sob, rushing closer and wrapped his arms around the little boy tightly. He cried silently, now fat drops of tears fell uncontrollably down his wet cheeks.

“I..I can't. I'm not your—”

“ _Dean?_ ”

“ _Dean baby, wake up._ ”

There's an echoing sounds of a very familiar voice calling out to him. Dean held tight against the kid, his heart was broken in his chest.

“ _Dean, please cher I need you to wake up. It's just a nightmare, I'm here Dean_.”

The voice was still calling out to him and seconds after, Dean's eyes were rushed opened and he was hyperventilating. The kid was gone and his arms wrapped to the closest person he had; Benny.

“Benny...I'm—I'm sorry!”

“Shhh..It's okay now, it's just a nightmare. Hey, hey look at me cher, please.”

Dean sniffled, as he lifted up his head from Benny's neck where he inhaled the calming scent of his mate. He stared up into the pair of lighter blue eyes with his glassy ones.

“I'm here now, Dean. I love you. Always will be.” Benny speaks so gently, and Dean finally calmed down with his breathing.

He has Benny and his Alpha will never leave him. Everything's fine. As long as there's Benny, he know he didn't need anything else.

A month later, Dean was waiting impatiently for Benny to come home as he sat on their bed only in his boxer briefs and Benny's old college t-shirt that hung slightly loose around his shoulders. Even with the smell of their scents mingled together surrounding him, he couldn't help feeling nervous but apparently very very excited.

Years trying and failing, _finally_ Dean is pregnant.

He fought the smile that widened up his cheeks as he clutched down the _fifth?_ pregnancy test in his hand tightly, his feet literally bouncing restlessly on the floor. He swore he alnost fainted from the excitement when he saw the positive result from his first test. He still couldn't believe it as he went out and bought four more pregnancy tests and tried them all. When he came to the fifth _positive_ result, he decided he wanted to show it to his husband as a surprise. Benny didn't even suspect anything when Dean began having his morning sickness, insisted for the omega to rest at home and eat the mushroom soup that he made for Dean. With a long kiss on the forehead, and a hush whisper of ‘I love you’ Benny had gone to work at the restaurant.

Goddammit, Dean couldn't wait to tell his alpha.

What took Benny so long anyway? Dean glanced at his phone for the millionth time, it was already 8:40 PM and Benny's shift for every Tuesdays was supposed to end at 8 PM. Their apartment was only fifteen minutes away minus the traffic so..why do Benny's not home yet?

“Come on, Benny.” Dean muttered to himself anxiously, as he fought the strong urge to just call his alpha and tell the news straightaway through the phone. But that would ruin the surprise.

His phone rang just a minute later and Dean almost jumped out of surprise. His heartbeat quickened, thinking it was his husband that was ringing on him but a slight disappointment washed over him when he frowned down at the unknown number.

Maybe it was Sam's new number? Trust him, that sasquatch of his brother often changed phone number as babies changed their diapers.

Without thinking much, guessing it was probably Sam, Dean picked up the phone.

“Hello?”

Instead of Sam's familiar voice, it was some woman's voice that greeted him on the line.

“Mr. Dean Winchester?”

“Yes? Who is this? Listen, maybe you got the wrong number because—”

“Your husband's been admitted to the General Hospital due to a car accident and he's in the ER right now. You're the first emergency contact number in—”

Dean's world swayed upon his feet. _Benny's in the hospital? His mate is in the hospital!_

“…what? B—Benny is..my _mate_ is..”

“Sir? Calm down please, we're doing the best as we can to save him but most importantly, your alpha needs you.”

The pregnancy test fell onto the floor with a loud ‘clack’ as Dean's began to clutch his head with his now free hand. He pulled on his hair, his mind was screaming at him, grasping and trying to process everything that just happened.

“O—Okay, yeah.” With that last spoken, the woman hangs up and Dean immediately went to call his brother.

Sam as usual answered the call in an instant, cheery voice turned concern and worry as he listened to what Dean managed to get out of his mouth. He seriously couldn't drive his car at this moment and with Sam being only lived in few blocks away, he could at least drive Dean to the hospital. The only thought of his husband lying lifelessly on the hospital bed worsened his hiccuping, as he cried silently whilst tears ran down his face. He felt a sudden agony, strong enough that he knew something was happening to him and Benny's mates' bond that tied them together. The strong pull that he always felt towards the alpha was dim, weakening and Dean desperately tried to reach out towards the invisible string, hands clutched against his chest as he weeps.

Not even ten minutes later, Sam found him curled up on the bed, with tears streaked cheeks, and wet shirt. Being an Alpha, Sam easily maneuvered his brother, getting Dean into warmer clothes and pants with such gentle touches and hush words then Sam held his omega brother tight against his bigger build whilst they made their way out of the apartment.

Dean cried all the way to the hospital with his hand rested on top of his still flat belly, eyes slowly drooped before he fell asleep.


	2. Two.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> back again with an update after what feels like years, so here ya go. this is not beta'd and i am sorry for any mistakes or typos.
> 
> enjoy!

Waking up alone was never in Dean's bucket list (thank you very much) but truth is, the reality was often hurts rather than living inside his fucked up head for literally _months._ Sammy had him going to some omega specialist therapist for few months now, though most of the days Dean had to be physically dragged away from the mess of his bed, then showered and had to have Sam dressed him up then made him eat before they went to the appointment.

They were still late by ten minutes but, hey, at least it was an _improvement._

Dean groaned into the softness of his pillow, before he blindly reached for his phone which he had somewhere beneath the crumpled mess of the sheet.

It was 3 AM, Dean had to squint his eyes due to the brightness of the phone screen before he slammed the device down back onto the duvet. He rolled over onto his back, eyes staring up at the dark ceiling with his hands came resting subconsciously onto his flat abdomen.

He stroked his thumb gently just beneath his navel through the thin shirt he wore, and felt a single streak of tear slid down from the edge of his right eye. He quickly rolled over onto his side, curled up whilst his arms wrapped around his stomach as he began to weep silently.

The air surrounding him smelled so foreign and different from what he used to _seven months_ ago in his little haven where he once lived with his late husband, Benny. After he had an unfortunate miscarriaged due to the aftershock of losing his mate, Sammy brought Dean to stay with him and Jess for two months before Dean finally decided that he was overstaying his welcome. They both argued for a short moment, before Sam finally gave up and had arranged his brother to an empty apartment room just two floors above theirs. 

Dean has never been so grateful that day to finally have his own space to willow in his self pity situation.

The pitter patter of rain droplets hitting the windows remind him of the day he had to watch his own mate, buried six feet under and he clenched upon his own shirt, the flood of memories suddenly washed over him; drowning his conscious in it. 

So he did what he's done the best.

Live and forget.

It has been a struggle, with him being an omega and all that hormone shit he had going through but a year after, with the adequate supports from Sammy, and his family alongside with his co–worker and practically everyone around him; Dean decided and had been absolute in taking the big step forward.

He's going to move out. Move out from the town and try to find the better version of himself. It's hard, not gonna lie—but his therapist once said to not giving up on living and Benny would surely love to know that his omega is happy and healthy. So, Dean's gonna try to mend his wound and possibly treat the scars that was left behind.

Thankfully, with the help of Bobby Dean got a pretty promising job with a good pay in a town at Illinois and Dean's actually felt slightly if not, a little bit eager to start a new life there. 

Maybe he'll get to know more good people, or...maybe a potential Alpha? No, no...he's not ready for any kind of relationship yet because despite everything, _it is still hurts_ so perhaps just get to know some new friends.

Yeah, he'll do just that. 

He has been counting on days on leaving the apartment, with only small amount of packed boxes filled with his stuffs, _some of_ _them_ _were Benny's; like hoodies and pajamas,_ his wedding albums and framed photos wrapped up nicely, then all his utensils and such; in separated boxes. 

It's not much but it's more than enough.

Packing everything up inside his impala, he smiled and hugged Sam and Jess thanking them and promised to come over for Christmas if he could make it before he went inside the car, of course—not with a last big hug again from his giant sasquatch of alpha brother. 

Not even taking any last glance at the town he used to be living for years, Dean drove in silence all the way to Pontiac.

* * *

Six months into living in a decent sized apartment, Dean had to admit that literally everyone here is nice. There's his neighbour, a local sheriff, Donna with her wife, police officer Jody, both betas and they always baked pies for him since the first day he moved in. Then, his boss Rufus, a very fussy and sarcastic Alpha but kind enough to let Dean had a whole week of day offs to finish his heat and taking care of Dean in that weird gruff way of his.

Rufus felt like an uncle to him and he's been grateful to meet someone who actually nice to him despite being a male omega and all that shit.

Overall, everything here is a really great change of his way of living. 

It's been almost nearing the two years mark since his alpha mate died, though Dean still felt the hollow pulled inside his chest sometimes but he's got a lot of things to do to avert his mind away from it. His wedding albums and photos were still tightly sealed away in that box and maybe it stayed that way until the day he felt strong enough to open it. He also had Benny's hoodies and pajamas folded and tucked at the bottom pile of his other shirts but he's not going to say anything about it.

“Sorry—I was in a rush and I…” 

There's a strong crash collided against his body and he was so taken aback to even respond in any sort of way. A deep gravelly voice caught his immediate attention and then he just realized that he was practically falling before his butt landed onto the pavement with an ‘oof’ sound came out from his mouth. He hissed through his teeth because, _damn that actually hurts_ then a hand reached out to him, palm up.

Dean was anchored back to his surrounding, and suddenly his other senses heightened before everything went back online as he smells the most amazing scent in the world. Everything rushed to him at once; the smell of sweet watermelon, but with a hint of some sandal wood and...was that caramel? That scent was actually the worst combination maybe, but somehow it sticks so very well together when he inhaled it into his nostrils. 

He was glad he's wearing his scent blocker or any people around his radius might smell how he's already leaking a bit of slick whilst practically oozing sex pheromones right fucking now.

 _“Fuck,”_ Dean groaned for every right reasons.

“Hey, you okay?” the deep gravelly voice called out again and Dean suddenly remembered about crashing into a guy earlier. He finally lifted up his eyes and stare at the man in front of him.

The guy still had his hand out for Dean and Dean fought so hard from blushing as he grabbed onto the alpha's hand. Yep. An alpha.

“Yeah, thanks man. Sorry, didn't see you there.” Dean tried muses out as he dusted down his jeans with his palms.

The alpha smiled at him, though just with a small quirk of lips and _oh god_ Dean had to stop himself from thinking about kissing those pink plush lips. Oh. Did he fucking forget to mention how _hot_ this alpha is? All in his glory with dark hair styled in sexy messy kind of way, and perfect facial structures, broad shoulders covered up with those ridiculous trench coat but somehow looked so devilishly handsome in it, and _fuck, those blue eyes_. Eyes that were so blue it looked so etheral and mesmerizing at the same time.

Damn it, Dean.

“It's my fault, I was in a rush. Hope you're okay?” The alpha said worriedly, eyebrows knitted together and Dean's heart beats so goddamn fast. Shit.

He stammered, “Y—yeah, I'm good. So, uh, yeah. You're in a hurry so...” 

The guy's eyes widened suddenly and immediately checked on his wristwatch, cursing out a rather loud ‘fuck’ before he gave a last small smile to Dean, bowing slightly before he took off in a rush. 

Dean couldn't help but taking a deep breath, hoping he would at least get some of that delicious scent from the faint traces of it in the air.

He went back home, totally forgetting the main reason why he wandered down the streets towards his favourite bakery without any breads and pies accompanied him back to the apartment.

Days went by and Dean couldn't shake off the thoughts about the stranger alpha he collided to last week. He constantly found himself walking down the streets, just few blocks down his apartment so he didn't even bother driving his baby. He'd be walking leisurely along the pavement, not really with any destination in mind—just the apparent thought of meeting the alpha but to no avail, there's no watermelon, sandal wood and caramel scents in the air around him. 

His inner omega wailed in slight despair, somehow desperate to see the alpha that riling them up so much. Dean sighed, probably for the umpteenth time, hands in his pockets with his head held low.

He made a turned as he was nearing a cafe before a disheveled mop of messy dark hair caught his peripheral view. He turned his head so fast that his neck might break as he landed his eyes on a hunching figure inside the cafe, sitting in one of the booths with a book in his hand.

Dean walked closer towards the cafe's large window, definitely _*not staring like a_ _creep*_ as he made out the silhouette of dark suited man with his trenchcoat draped onto the back of his chair. When he was most definite that it was his _—the_ alpha, Dean inhaled deeply, just for reassurance and braved himself to stride into the cafe with his head held high. _Not that high but, you guys get the gist._

As any typical cafe that he's ever been to—of course, there's a bell hung on top of the door and it jingles as he stepped inside the cool aircond surrounding. He was immediately hit with mixes of different scents and smell, but only one stood out the most to him. 

Obviously; the sweet watermelon, with a hint of sandal wood and caramel scents hit him the strongest.

Not to be a weirdo, he went towards the counter first instead of straight away taking a seat near the alpha and he ordered a black americano on the go as the smiley beta cashier greeted him. Dean waited near the counter, with his heart hammering inside his chest whilst he repeatedly chants, _this is not a_ _very good idea_ over and over again in his mind. 

When the cheery beta handed him his iced americano, he smiled towards the girl and left some tip for her since he felt generous for some reason today before he went towards the booth near the alpha.

He purposely walked slowly, still battling over inside his head whilst his eyes literally glued themselves onto the alpha's broad back. 

But then, the bell chimes and Dean couldn't help but turned and saw a red head omega, so pretty with a small child holding her hand as they went in. She made an eye contact with Dean for a brief second and smiled. Dean smiled back, just when the boy wiggling his hand to be freed from her hand and ran towards the booth _where…Dean frowns,_ the alpha was sitting?

“Dada! Dada!” the boy exclaimed happily as he jumped enthusiastically into the alpha's arms.

Dean's heart shattered. 

Yeah, right. He's so fucking stupid to think that the perfect alpha he was starting to take interest in wasn't already mated. Ha. Should've thought about it earlier. But, he doesn't smell mated? Whatever.

Dean's shoulders drooped, averting his eyes away before anyone even realized that he's actually staring longingly at the scene unfolded in front of him. The picture of a perfect family. Pups. Mates.

His eyes watered before he was even aware and he quickly made his way out of the cafe. The cup of iced americano felt heavy in his hand and he threw it away, not even bothered to finish the drink.

That night, Dean went into bed with a thought of a certain blue eyed alpha in his mind as he tried to ignore the heavy pulls from his inner omega that demanded the alpha's presence.

Suddenly, in the cold of the night and the lack of warmth on the bed next to him, _he misses Benny._

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i don't know a thing about Pontiac or Illinois for that matter, so i just went with my imagination instead of how the city would be and so on. 
> 
> Btw, next chap will be in Cas' pov so, yeah.
> 
> Thank you for reading!


End file.
